How to make up your own blood-libel....

Here's a handy guide to making up your own blood libel agains the Jews...

Culprit: (pick one)

1) New Jersey Sephardi Rabbis
2) IDF soldiers serving in occupied West Bank
3) Israeli arms dealer in break-away republic in Africa (or Latin America)
4) Jewish employee of the U.S. Defense Department
5) Bernard "Cash Money" Madoff


Accused of: (at least one)

1) Harvesting organs from dead/dying/unconscious gentiles
2) Eating, and/or trafficking in said organs
3) Importing narcotics and/or pornography to Arab world
4) Forcing starving Gazans to eat their homes*
5) Requiring West Bank Palestinians to play a violin on command any time they pass a checkpoint*


Story revealed by: (pick one)
1) Unnamed courageous Arab youth interviewed by non-Arabic speaking journalist
2) Israeli living abroad, with rather pedestrian musical talents and a CD soon to be released
3) Palestinian filmmaker whose film is funded by an Israeli university
4) Australian Catholic filmmaker
5) Blog


Israeli response: (as many as applicable)
1) Howls of "anti-Semitism", "blood libel"
2) Summoning of envoy to country from whence article originated
3) Short-lived calls for a boycott
4) Full-page ad purchased in publication read mainly by Jews
5) Drawing up of plans for a tactical strike against hydroelectric dam located closest to publisher of article

*Only relevant if culprit is an IDF soldier


Manufactured blood libels can be sent to the following destinations:

Iran Foreign Ministry

Hamas official government Web site

Stormfront White Nationalist Community

Islamic Resistance in Lebanon (Hezbollah Web site - Hebrew version)

Aftonbladet

Anti-Defamation League