Fun and games at the Tehran book fair...

Nothing like the latest ant-Israeli books and games....

Iran’s massive annual literary fest, it seems, has pretty much something for everyone: Thomas the Tank Engine, interior decorating, Microsoft Windows programming, “How to Kill an Israeli” and Jean-Paul Sartre.

“We have a stand here every year,” explained a young man at the Hamas booth, which featured T-shirts blazened with the portrait of their late spiritual leader, Sheikh Ahmed Yassin, replica suicide bomber headbands and posters featuring mug shots of Palestinians who ”blew themselves to bits”.

The literary message, explained the young Hamas rep, was that ”they blow themselves up so others can have a better life”.

Hamas, he said, also has an office in the Islamic republic, “and a bank account number for donations”.

The man at the Islamic Jihad booth appeared to a bit bore, perhaps slightly frustrated given that most visitors seemed to prefer books about Big Bird next door. He is offering a history of Palestine pamphlet and a rather bloody CD-Rom on “Martyrdom-Seeking Operators”.

And, even Hezbollah has a stand.

One stand had a real assault rifle on display. That was the Hezbollah booth -- more of a multimedia experience, which was quite unique.

“Captured from the Zionists in Southern Lebanon,” explained the Lebanese Shiite movement’s rep as he showed off the rusty rifle. ”We’ve had a lot of people coming by, and nearly all our books have sold out after just two days.”

They may have a hard time competing with the more entertaining books in the foreign publisher section -- especially with Britain’s Mr. Tickle and the other much-loved Mr. Men stories.

But Hezbollah even had something for kids: “Resistance Boy: The Boy from Quds (Jerusalem)” is the name of the PC CD-ROM.

“It’s a game for children. They have to shoot down Israeli aircraft and shoot at other things,” explained the Hezbollah salesman.

For adults he recommended “Special Force”, a 3D shoot-em-up in which nifty programmers have managed to turn aliens into Israelis, and where the object of the game is to die.

Gee, they know how to have fun in Tehran.