GayandRight

My name is Fred and I am a gay conservative living in Ottawa. This blog supports limited government, the right of the State of Israel to live in peace and security, and tries to expose the threat to us all from cultural relativism, post-modernism, and radical Islam. I am also the founder of the Free Thinking Film Society in Ottawa (www.freethinkingfilms.com)

Friday, May 13, 2011

Jack Layton's Memo to the NDP Caucus...

Memo to: NDP MPs, Brad Lavigne

Re: First Caucus Meeting

I want to congratulate all incoming MPs – I know you all worked hard to win your riding.

Our first caucus meeting is on May 20th at The Green Door Restaurant (198 Main Street) starting sharp first thing in the morning at 10:30 AM. We’ve booked the entire restaurant , so no worries about what you say. By the way, caucus meetings are vegan only (Libby goes ballistic if she even sees cheese). I heartily recommend the cucumber sandwiches.

Olivia would prefer if everybody could bike to the restaurant. If you don’t have your own bike, Brad has just received a shipment of sturdy 1-speed bikes from China. You’ll love them!

There will be press outside and I want them to get some great pictures of everybody arriving. Please do NOT talk to the press, unless they are from Rabble. You’ll be able to recognize the Rabble folks because they’ll all be wearing Keffiyehs. You can count on them to get the facts right.

A short note about the dress code. Orange, orange, orange. Enough said on that.

If you have to wear a button, then please only wear the standard orange NDP buttons. Leave your Cindy Sheehan and George Bush buttons at home. I don’t expect suits for the guys – but for those of you who don’t own a sports jacket, please see Brad for our list of union tailors.

For all of our womyn - please no sleeveless shirts – I don’t want people to think you are from Sun News.

Brad has arranged a nice surprise for everybody – we’ve gotten the National Cane company to market a ‘Jack Layton’ model, and everybody will go home a shining brand new cane. Limit is one per person, but if you want some for your friends and family, Brad can give you a link on the web.

We typically start our caucus meetings with the National Anthem. For those of you don’t know the lyrics to O Canada, please check your handouts when you arrive. We’ll also be singing Gens du Pays. If you can’t pronounce the words, then please hum along!

Remember not to tweet during our meeting. But, to help you after the meeting, Brad will be giving out our platform in 140 word segments.

Jack

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Methinks Libby is deep frying those cucumber sandwiches in Crisco to maintain that 'figure' of hers.

2:27 PM  

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